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IV stands

I woke up at 9AM today, feeling tired again. It's been like this for days already. Stayed up late last night. Woke up feeling sleep deprived. 
I'd be preparing my lemon water before starting my day but before going about it I remembered my mother. I remembered how strong she was back then when she can still carry her IV stand to the CR when she needs to relieve herself. 
Fast forward to her last week when most of her strength was gone, I recalled a thing I'd make her do. I'd let her hold my hand and squeeze it as hard as she could. It did not hurt. But I remembered her strength and determination being felt by my hand. And most importantly her hope - that somehow at some point everything will be okay.
I miss you mama each and every day. 
Recent posts

This is not a fathers day blog entry

My father died when I was 3. Back then I never knew what being dead meant. What it meant to my father and also for me. My mother told me that while she was carrying me as I look at my father on his casket I kept on asking papa to wake up and get out of the box so he can breathe and not die. Ironic isn't it? That while my father was already peacefully tucked inside his coffin I was adamant that he get out and get some air.
Back then, I never knew the concept of death. I don't know at what age children start to realize that their dead father is not asleep or that he is never going back from his "vacation." That people don't just go somewhere and never come back. And that people don't normally forget how to breathe in their sleep. Those were white lies told to us because back then when our brain could not process the idea of someone being dead especially a loved one.
At what age do children understand what dying means for the dead and for those who are left behind…

The things we do for our sisters

Earlier today, before leaving for church, I asked ate for money (I always do, the independent Tobby in me encourages me to do so.) My plan was to hand it to Jett but the kid left right after the Cell Celebration without even notifying me (yey, more money for me!) So after receiving money from her I asked if she will go out with a-person-who-must-not-be-named-anymore. She nodded. And then another question followed, "Are you and a-person-who-must-not-be-named-anymore already together?" She looked at me and said yes, while laughing (like it was a joke or something.) I laughed too (to mask my confusion), because that's what brothers do when their sister is romantically with somebody. 
I asked when she decided it was a go - that they can bring the dating thing they were doing (for quite a while I guess) to another level. She told me she wasn't particular of the date. She just signaled the green light and puff (with smokes and all) they're officially together.
I couldn&#…

Campus Convergence 2018: Seize Your Destiny

PLUS NETWORK, the campus-reaching arm of Kerusso For Christ Int'l, in partnership with SALT and LIGHT, brings you CAMPUS CONVERGENCE: SEIZE YOUR DESTINY! Students from seven campuses in Taguig City will come together as one, for the first time, to seize their God-given destiny on March 09, 2018, 5pm at DUEƑAS GYM, Central Signal Taguig! Join us and let us seize our destinies together! See you there!

Spend time with your spiritual leaders...

...aside from God (of course), that should be established first. If you haven't yet then you need to prioritize your relationship with Him.
I have always loved talking with people - it is one of the best ways to gain insights and wisdom.
That is why I really treasure such moments I have with leaders I look up to because of the invaluable wisdom I get from just having a hearty one-on-one with them.
What you'll receive during an hour of conversation are years of experience and wisdom on discipleship, ministry building, and spirituality, condensed in these easy-to-bite nuggets of wisdom.
Consider it a plus if they'll open up about their personal lives - that can be humbling and encouraging.
So, how do you spend your time with your spiritual leaders? Do you even make it a point to ask them to make time for you out of their hectic schedules? I know it's a stretch but who knows? 
That's why I'm so grateful for the wisdom I get from my beloved leaders. 
They encourage, inspi…

What worship is not

Worship is more than listening to praise and worship songs. 
It's not even close. 
Worship is more than singing, clapping, jumping, and dancing. Just because you know every single word of the song and its beat and melody doesn't mean you're more likely to feel God's presence.
Don't equate those to worship.
Crying is not worship. And so is kneeling and beating your chest.
Worship is birthed from a heart that is surrendered to the authority of God. 
It is the outflow of gratitude and humility brought by God's undeserved grace for us.
Worship is an outward expression of an inward devotion.
It transcends actions and other visible manifestions; for the heart of worship is our heart.

Six Feet Under (S03E07)

Brenda talking about her father's passing (who died of Gastric Cancer). 

These were exactly her words to Nate:

Watching him die was like watching somebody got washed out at sea, only they're sitting right there in bed. Wave comes and takes them a little away. Another wave comes, takes them a little away. Every wave is a day. Little by little, off they, off they go.
This illustration of a loved one dying is so poignant and heartbreaking.