I’m not lazy. I’ve been keeping myself accustomed with academic endeavours ever since. The more the project, the happier I’ll be. But things just changed a bit now. The hardworking and diligent me became the lazy, procrastinator, parasitic, student now. What happened? What went wrong? It seems ironic, because now that I have the resources an IT student must have I became hooked to watching movies and videos all day. Having no idea of the heap of projects, assignments and MPs that awaits me after the killing of time pastimes I have. What will be my future?
I have no plans of being a programmer. If I were to choose, I’ll be a blogger or a writer. But that’s a difficult job too. I don’t eat codes and talk to people about their syntax. I’m just a simple guy who wants to write and write about things that matter most to me. I’m not good at Database Management and troubleshooting of programs etc. All I wanted to do is to be able to do something I love giving me a sense of fulfillment.
In the near future what will matter is not the job you have but the fulfillment you have by doing it. I don’t want to be working just for the money. I want to be emotionally attached to my job, a job that will not stress me and will give me the drive to finish the task because it’s worth finishing.
But I’ve already made the decision. And there’s no turning back. I just wanted to pass all the subjects even without flying colors (that’s so elementary). And also finish the course that I have as of the moment. I’ll take this as a blessing because some people are deprived from going to college and getting a degree.
What to do? Set my priorities and get things done the way they should be. One year is enough for me to carry the invisible burden on my back. I still like programming but I don’t like it as much as I like writing. Maybe time will come when God’s plan will unravel right in front of me. And as the unraveling happens it will also answer some of the questions I’ve been trying to answer all my life.
It all boils down to this: “There’s no turning back and no point of returning. The only way is forward and the only place for me is on top!”