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The Friend I Never Had by eMOTionally MOTivated

 Years have passed and yet I'm still dumbfounded
Blinding myself from the truth that our friendship has ended
Was I to be blamed? Or you who seemed not to care?
For I missed the moments and the unforgettable times we shared
As first I thought, it'll be easy on my part
But then I discovered that everything was falling apart 
From the moment we met until the time I departed 
My heart was filled with longingness, for your presence I waited
It's been a year and a half since we became silent
I've become so evasive with my heart full of resentment
One day, you promised that you'll settle the problem and befriend me again
But I was too skeptic and was not ready to face it then..
We just passed each other without greeting and talking
As if nothing happened for I thought I was just dreaming
I wanted to wake up from the nightmare and be friends with you 
But the hatred has deepen and the gap has widened between us two 
I've been trying to lower my pride for yours is 6 feet below the ground
Wanting to disclose the issue and start again from step one
But I found it too difficult to confront, too hard to approach you
For I was so helpless and just miss you
It's hard to accept such a fact when you know you couldn't work it out
But it's more difficult to just act unaffected but deep inside you're wiped out
It'll be like this, like what we were before
Strangers... if I could only clamor
I've been telling myself to move on and be happy again
Because it tears me apart and leave me emotionally barren
I just needed to be on myself now
To accept the fact that we're not meant to be friends somehow
It may take a lifetime to forget a friend like you
That's why I'm moving on.. it would be better for us two.

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